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Eating disordersFor yourself55 min read

Binge eating and bulimia

Eating a great deal, fast, without being able to stop, then the shame, the promises, and the next day spent making up for it. This guide explains what a binge really is, why dietary restriction is its main fuel, and how to break out of the circle: eating regularly, observing without judging yourself, defusing the triggers, and finding a liveable relationship with your body and with food again.

In short

This guide is for adults who have binges, whether bulimic or purely overeating, for those who wonder whether what they are living through has a name, and for those close to them who are trying to understand. It describes what research has established: binges are not a problem of willpower, they are sustained by a precise mechanism, and that mechanism can be dismantled. It then offers a concrete, tested method, which begins with a simple and counter-intuitive measure — putting regular meals back in place — and continues over several weeks.

Topic
Eating disorders
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For yourself
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The programme

This guide is psychoeducational content. It does not replace a consultation. Certain signs call for prompt medical advice: repeated vomiting, feeling faint, palpitations, dizziness, muscle weakness, regular use of products intended to get rid of what has been eaten, binges during pregnancy or in a person with diabetes. See section 21. If you are thinking about dying, call your doctor the same day or, in immediate danger, the emergency services. Allow fifty-five minutes to read.

1. Before you begin

It is ten in the evening. The day has gone well: a coffee in the morning, almost nothing at midday, willpower all day long. And then you open a cupboard, without really thinking about it, and an hour later you are sitting on the kitchen floor, surrounded by wrappers, your stomach hurting, with a single thought: how could I have done that again. The next day starts with a promise: today, nothing. And the circle starts again.

Three things, straight away.

A binge is not a lack of willpower. It is the predictable result of a well-described biological and psychological mechanism. People who are highly determined in every other area of their lives have binges, precisely because they are determined to restrict themselves.

Restriction is the main fuel of binges. This is the most counter-intuitive point in this guide, and the most solidly established: the less you eat during the day, the more likely the evening binge becomes. Treatment therefore does not begin by eating less, but by eating regularly.

It can be treated, and treated rather well. Eating binges are among those psychological difficulties for which precise, evaluated methods exist, part of which can be carried out through guided self-help. Many people are markedly better within a few months.

Who this guide is for

For you if you eat in binges, with the feeling that you cannot stop, whether or not you make yourself vomit afterwards.

For you if for years you have alternated between periods of strict control and periods when everything gives way.

For you if you eat too much in the evening, alone, in secret, and the shame that follows occupies a large place in your life.

For you if someone close to you is living through this and you want to understand what is really happening.

2. What a binge is

Three elements, not one

Many people say 'I had a binge' thinking mainly of the quantity. In reality, three things define an eating binge, and quantity is neither the first nor the most important.

  • The loss of control. This is the central element. The feeling that something has been set off and that you can no longer stop it, that you are watching your own hand reach towards the cupboard. Some people describe an altered state, an acceleration, a fog.
  • The quantity, in relation to the circumstances. Eating, within a limited period, markedly more than most people would eat in the same situation. It is relative: three helpings at a celebration meal are not a binge; the same thing alone, at eleven at night, after a day of restriction, often is.
  • The distress that follows. The shame, the disgust, the guilt, the panic, sometimes a heavy torpor. That is what turns an eating episode into a psychological problem.

What it is like from the inside

The descriptions resemble one another from person to person. It often starts with an innocuous thought, 'just one square', or with a tiny transgression of a rule one had set oneself. Then a tipping point: since it is spoilt anyway, one may as well go all the way. The speed increases. Taste disappears fairly quickly; most people report that they no longer really taste what they are eating. The body becomes uncomfortable, then painful. And the binge stops, not through fullness, but through exhaustion, through pain, through supplies running out, or because someone comes home.

What comes afterwards

This is often the worst moment: the taut stomach, the shame, the fear of the next day, the tiredness. Many people describe an inner sense of dirtiness that is hard to put into words, and the conviction that they are the only one who does this. They are not: eating binges are one of the most frequent and least admitted psychological difficulties.

Objective binges and subjective binges

Some people feel every element of a binge — loss of control, shame, collapse — over a quantity that, seen from the outside, remains ordinary: a few biscuits, a piece of bread. This is called a subjective binge. The suffering is just as real, the mechanism is the same, and this guide applies in the same way. What is at stake is not the quantity but the breaking of a rule.

What a binge is not

It is not greed. Greed is savoured; a binge is not savoured.

It is not a problem of nutritional knowledge. Most people who have binges know far more about food than the average.

It is not a choice. No one chooses to spend their evenings, their money and their self-esteem on it.


The rest is for members

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Frequently asked questions

Am I really having binges, or am I just eating too much? Look at the loss of control rather than the quantity. If you have the feeling that you cannot stop, if the episode is followed by shame and if you try to hide it, it is indeed a binge, whatever the quantity was.

Why do the binges always come in the evening? Because the day of restriction prepares them, because tiredness lowers the resistances, because loneliness and emptiness are more present, and because the evening is the moment when inner supervision relaxes. It is the most predictable combination in the disorder.

If I eat regularly, am I going to put on weight? This is the most frequent fear, and it is not borne out in the evaluated protocols. Binges often represent a substantial share of intake; reducing them amply makes up for the meals added. Stability is worth more than the alternation between restriction and binge.

Should I get rid of the foods that trigger my binges? Temporarily, during the first weeks, it is reasonable not to keep them within reach. Permanently, no: a forbidden food becomes a charged food, and the charge is precisely what triggers. The aim is to reintroduce them calmly, in section 12.

Can I get through this without therapy? Some people manage it, in particular with a structured programme and light support: that is what the work on guided self-help shows. If nothing shifts after two months of serious application, or if you make yourself vomit, support is necessary.

How long does it take to get better? Binges often decrease in the first weeks. The relationship with the body and the place of weight in self-esteem take several months, sometimes more than a year. The two timetables are different, and it is normal that the second is slower.

I make myself vomit but not every day. Is that serious? There is no frequency without risk. The consequences for the body's salts, the heart, the oesophagus and the teeth do not depend only on the number of episodes. Talk to a doctor about it, without waiting for a 'threshold'.

My weight is normal, am I entitled to ask for help? Yes. Most people who have binges have an ordinary weight, and that is precisely what makes the disorder invisible. The suffering and its impact are enough to justify a consultation.

Can the binges come from a lack of something in my diet? Overall restriction plays a central role, and it is in that sense that 'lacking' counts. On the other hand, no supplement and no particular diet has been shown to have an effect on binges. What works is regularity.

What should I do if I have a binge after several weeks without one? The next meal takes place at the planned time, you note what happened, and you pick up the thread. An isolated binge after an improvement is an ordinary incident, not a return to square one.

My partner says all you have to do is control yourself. How can I explain it to him? You can show him section 5: it is the people who exercise the most control over their eating who have the most binges, and restriction is a documented trigger. It is not a question of character, it is a mechanism.

Can food-tracking apps help me? Most often, they make things worse: they reinforce counting, rules and monitoring. Prefer a record without numbers, centred on the timings, the context and the emotions.

Will I be forced to eat or to put on weight if I seek help? That is not how care for binges works. The work bears on regularity, on the rules and on the relationship with the body; the decisions belong to you, and you can ask this question at the very first appointment.

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